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My brother’s movement from the 9th the 6th floor was an encouraging prospect for me. Not only was he now awake but I could really talk to him. Oh and how we did talk!

I would go everyday sometimes right after work or after school. The visiting hours were stricter now and I had to abide by them.

Until someone like me (Ms. Susie plain-Jane) tells YOU what its like to talk to someone who’s brain has been heavily polluted by bodily toxins you really don’t know what you could be in for. But since I am a sharer.. Here we go!

So to start off for my brother’s first week and a half in Surgery recovery he had to have a babysitter. You see my brother wanted to get out of the hospital (actually, who wouldn’t) and they had to have a safety companion sit with him 24 hours a day to keep an eye on him. He kept trying to escape. When I realized that this was a round the clock effort I made it a priority to thank each and every one of his Safety Companions for being kind to my brother and let them know that my family and I appreciated them.

I remember one particular visit, I was only able to stay with him for not even 5 minutes because he told me “Sue, you know how I tell you to trust me on certain things.. (WITH HIS EYES WIDER THAN I HAVE EVER SEEN THEM IN MY LIFE) well this is one of these times. So Sue, we just have to get out of here and go home and then we can come back tomorrow” While he was saying this he was giving side glances to the babysitter and then under his breath saying “these people are crazy” “we have to get out of here” and then he said “That’s right Sue, we will come back tomorrow, we promise right?”

I realized how my presence there was making him want to be home and was not helping him. It was also the same time that I was pretty sure that I was going to be in for a wild ride both mentally and emotionally. It’s painful to watch someone who you have known all of your life behave like a certifiable crazy person. I mean, he knew who I was but he was on a totally different level.

While this crazy talk lasted about a week and a half with the help of medicines his ammonia level was going down and this was starting to help in giving him his mental clarity back.

One day we had conversation where I used every ounce ( and I mean every ounce) of my knowledge of Human Services and Psychology mixed in with human compassion and it started off something like this…

Him: Susie I think the are ALL lying to me in here.
Me: Why do you think that?
Him: What year is it?
Me: 2012.
Him: (Looking quite puzzled) So it’s not 2014?
Me: nope, its 2012.
Him: Let me ask you this, Am I wanted by the Authorities along with (our other brother) for breaking into a house?
Me: No.
Me You are not wanted by the authorities. The year is 2012 and the president is Barack Obama.
Him: Oh he won the Election?
Me: Yes
Him: That’s good..

Him: So we are not wanted by the authorities and it’s not 2014?
Me: That’s correct!

Him: WOW, why did I think that?

This is where I had to tell him that he hallucinated a lot while he was asleep and that there were probably a lot of things that he thought that happened that did not happen. I told him about how his blood was toxic and how that combined with all the medicine they had given him had put him in a bad way.

The conversation then turned to where he was and I said we are in Norwalk Hospital.

He said to me and I will never ever forget this “So, if the battleship turns around is it still in Norwalk?”
I said “We are not on a battleship” “we are on the 6th floor of Norwalk Hospital”
He said “I know the hospital, you can see it from the highway”
I told him yes you can and its up on a big hill remember?… so we are not on a Battleship.

With this I then said, Ok Tommy lets recap, the year is 2012, neither you nor our other brother are wanted by the Authorities and you are not on a battleship. You are in Norwalk Hospital, you have been very sick and you need to get better so we can get you out of here.

He took all this in and marveled at the fact that he had hallucinated so many things.

He then said.. Susie, can you remind me again of all this if I forget? I said I would and when needed.. I did.

I slowly and surely would work with my brother to help get him back to normal self or something as close as possible to it. I also began feverishly working behind the scenes at where he would go once they said it would be time for him to be discharged…

Around the time of my brothers second surgery his employer had informed me that she would be closing down his one man office that was located in our bucolic little downtown and that she would like to meet with me to get a key to the office.

I agreed to meet with her and mentally prepared myself to meet with a female version of my previous employer of Bootcamp & Co. We met at the tiny sticky-tabled cafe that was below my brothers office and sat down to have an awkward talk and a weak but needed on my part cup of coffee.

We surveyed each other (I could tell she had never met a woman like me) and after I had sucked down the coffee I was ready to get this shit over with and said “let’s head upstairs”. Since she had ordered nothing I took out my meager rations to pay for my coffee.. I kinda hoped under some shred of decency for my brothers 32 years of service (and that she was dealing with a woman in crisis) she would pay for my coffee out of kindness.. but she didn’t and I paid for the coffee and left Maria our waitress the appropriate tip.

We got upstairs and she took all that she needed out of my brothers bare-as-bones office. I mean the guy had a folding table for a computer desk, a computer that my other brother had cobbled together for him and crappy 20-year-old press-board furniture that had seen better days. The only new thing in the rinky-dink office of any worth was the fax machine.

She told me that she wanted to have the office cleaned out by a certain day and I said ok. I made plans to go back to the office that Friday and I get everything that was my brothers.

I was surprised when I got a call from his employer telling me that she went back that my brothers office that day and decided that she was also going to take his computer with her.

I was LIVID as it was not even hers to take. The files yes, the hardware, no. She had not purchased it . My other brother had put it together for my brother and the only thing she owned in it was the memory cards that my brother had to beg her to pay for. However, both my Father, Mother and my other brother told me that this was a battle that was not worth fighting. Let her have the computer Susie they told me. Put down your sword… there are better fights to fight.

I had to let it go. Oh how I wanted to take out my sword and start swinging away much like my love Gerard Butler did in the movie “300” but NO.. I was not granted such serene pleasure.

She had come down and done what she set after to do. Take all the things needed to run the business and go back up north to her life.

So, with a hardened heart I went on that Friday and I took every little thing that was my brothers and I left everything that wasnt. I felt so sad doing what I did. I loved my brother very much and knowing that I was closing down perhaps the one thing he COULD control in his life, his part in a business, well, it damn near killed me.

In the back of my head all I could think of was “how am I gonna tell my brother the office is gone”

My brother at this point was progressing well in the eyes of the hospital. He had woken up from his second surgery and one day, the week before Thanksgiving, I came to visit him on the 9th floor lo and behold I found he was transferred down to the 6 Floor of the hospital where those who are recovering from Surgery go.

I felt kinda lucky. I now got to have a different colored pass to clutch as I rode up the elevator…..